Q: Dear Dr. Skye: Did you hear in the news about the British study that says men think women with big lips are sexy?  Does this mean we all should get collagen injections in our lips? – Bess K., Monterey, CA

A: I’m going to take a guess that you mean the study about judging a man or woman’s suitability for a fling vs. a long-term commitment by their facial cues.  The men in the study generally preferred a woman they thought might be available for short-term sex, while women most often chose men they believed were husband material.  According to the men in the study, women with wide eyes and full lips seemed to signal a willingness to have a quick roll in the hay.  The women in the study thought men with softer features would be good long-term partners.  This is just one study, and I certainly wouldn’t go through the pain of collagen injections to give off the “quickie” vibe. 

Q: Dear Dr. Skye: I’m hosting a bachelorette party for my sister and want to serve food appropriate to the risqué theme of the party.  What do you suggest? – Izzie P., Bethesda, MD

A: You have a wealth of options.  You could choose food based on their alleged aphrodisiac qualities, such as chocolate, oysters and avocado.  Just Google “Aphrodisiacs” and you’ll get a long list.  You could serve drinks with risqué names, such as “Sex on the Beach” and “Fuzzy Nipple”.  There are a number of phallic-shaped foods, such as hotdogs, sausages, and meatballs , that could be arranged artfully.  And risqué retailers like Spencer Gifts sell pasta in shape of male organs.  Then, for dessert, most adult stores offer sexy cake pans and candy molds for adventuresome cooks, and many local bakeries sell adult-themed sweets.  For example, in Portland, OR, Voodoo Doughnut does a brisk business in pastries in the shape of erotic body parts.  Of course, you could also hire a male stripper who won’t mind being decorated with edible body paint!

Definition of the Day

[Dr. Skye credits Urbandictionary.com for its wealth of interesting words and definitions you won’t find in Webster’s Dictionary.]

Today’s Urbandictionary.com term: Proximity infatuation

Definition: A feeling of affection that develops out of nearness.

Usage example:

Student: “I swear I’m in love with this girl from philosophy class.  I’ve been sitting next to her for three weeks.”

Friend: “You’re getting caught up in a shortsighted proximity infatuation, man.  Wait until a couple weeks after class is over, and you won’t even remember her.”

Q: Dear Dr. Skye: You talked about dating services in a recent Q&A.  Aren’t they pretty risky? – Minnie G., Hershey, PA

A: The Better Business Bureau (BBB) receives many complaints about dating services, especially about their cancellation and memberships costs and their failure to provide what they claim in their marketing pitches.  In fact, complaints were up 73% from 2005 to 2006, and with the increase of clients, those complaints are expected to break records in 2008.  People interested in joining an online dating service or matchmaking service obviously should do their homework, including contacting the BBB (www.BBB.org) to check complaints against the company.  Compare the different services, take their claims with a grain of salt, and don’t give in to high-pressure sales pitches.  Know what you want from the company going in and how to cancel your service if you decide it’s not producing the results you desire.  And don’t stop trying some of the simplest ways to meet potential dates—such as volunteering, joining a club, or taking an adult education class.

Q: Dear Dr. Skye: I met this really cute guy at a club and was really attracted to him until we slow-danced.  He smelled!  And it’s not like he hadn’t showered or was wearing stinky cologne.  It was just him.  Really!  What’s up with that? — Dawn C., Newport Beach, CA

A: If we rule out any medical conditions and too much ingested garlic, it could be a case of incompatible pheromones.  Human bodies release pheromones – sometimes called “the sexual scent of attraction” – that lure some people and repel others.  You’d have to spend more time with the young man in question to determine the source of his scent.  Or you could sign up for the dating service, ScientificMatch.com, which pairs people by their scents.  According to a Universal Press Syndicate news item, the company “tests the genes of the ‘major histocompatibility complex’” because “in a study, women preferred the smell of T-shirts worn by men whose genes differed most.”  Unfortunately, the service isn’t cheap.  Instead of paying their $1,995 fee, you could spend that money on a lot of trips to the club to perform your own slow-dance scent tests!

Q: Dear Dr. Skye: I’m 58 and my divorce was final this month.  I’d like to start dating again.  Am I too old for Internet dating sites? — Charlotte M., Atlanta, GA

A: Not at all!  In fact, according to a recent USA Today article, singles over the age of 55 are flocking to online dating services.  Both PerfectMatch.com and Yahoo! Personals report that their biggest growth is in the over-55 market.  And Match.com said its over-55 membership has doubled since 2006.  The second largest online dating demographic is the 45-54 group.  So you’ll be in good company if you sign up for an Internet dating site.  Just be sure to take steps to stay safe if you arrange to meet a possible soulmate “in the real world”.